KuyaKevin.com

In this episode:
"Lessons from a video scandal."
"Should I date someone from a different culture?"

Just visit the podcast page http://kuyakevin.libsyn.com or look up Basta LoveLife on iTunes to download this episode for free. 

I’ve decided to weigh in on the Hayden Kho/Katrina Halili scandal. 

For those of you outside the Philippines, let me give you a little background:  Hayden Kho is a doctor who videotaped one of his sexual encounters with Katrina Halili, an actress.  The video somehow leaked, hit the internet (and even some bootleg video stores), and the scandal has since been all over the news.

I wasn’t planning to write about this.  But maybe it is time for me to say something—hopefully this can be a "teachable moment" for all of us.  Here are some of my thoughts:

What was done to Katrina Halili was despicable.

This goes without saying, but taking an intimate video/picture of someone without her consent is a complete invasion of privacy.  Spreading this video around was equally evil (if not more so).  Please keep this first point in mind as you read the rest of this post—I’m in no way trying to minimize the offense that was committed against Katrina Halili.

Sometimes we are sorry for the wrong reasons.

I bought a few teen magazines when we first started the podcast—I wanted to do a little research and see what teenage Filipinas were reading.  One of them included an interview with Vanessa Hudgens (the Fil-Am High School Musical star whose nude picture was scattered around the internet).  Her picture scandal was addressed in her interview, and her response was . . . well . . . lacking (quite an understatement).  She kind of laughed the whole thing off, stating that the picture was intended for some guy she liked.  According to the interview, even her mom didn’t take it too seriously.  In other words, Hudgens never said it was inappropriate for someone other than her husband to see her nude.

I’m afraid this attitude is all too common—both celebrities and the media are missing something.  Yes, there is public outrage over scandals.  But rarely does anyone mention the abuse and misuse of the gift of sex. 

Our “private” sins don’t always remain private.

I’m reminded of the story of David, Israel’s second king.  King David had everything a man could ever want, but he coveted another man’s wife.  He had an affair with her, got her pregnant, and ultimately murdered her husband to cover his sin (2 Samuel 11). 

David thought he had covered his tracks, but the Lord had some hard discipline in store for him.  David was forgiven, but his sin brought disastrous consequences to the kingdom.  His private sin ultimately brought public shame—David’s own son slept with his concubines on a rooftop “in the sight of all Israel” (2 Samuel 16:22). 

This scandal has reminded me to be careful in all that I do.

The real headlines aren’t in the headlines.

Katrina Halili and Dr Kho have been publicly embarrassed.  But the media will eventually lose interest and move on to something else.  

As a campus minister, I’m much more concerned with the private pain that will never make the news.  I regularly hear from those with broken hearts and (in some cases) broken lives.  These young people will never have their names on the headlines, but their stories are just as significant.  They are suffering from the spiritual, emotional, and physical consequences of non-marital sex.  In many cases, their problems will last much longer than the latest tabloid gossip (see also: Manila’s Silent Epidemic).  

Life is about choices.

Dr. Kho’s relationships with his family have been severely damaged.  His career is on hold and may never be what it once was.  He would never be in this situation if he had chosen to be a different kind of man. 

In the same way, Katrina Halili’s life would be much different if she had chosen the pathway of purity. 

I pray both of them will learn to make better choices.  I pray you will read this and do the same.

Disturbing news from the UK:

Most pregnancies among girls under 18 ended in abortion last year. 

Out of around 40,000 pregnancies more than 20,000 were terminated - the first time more had chosen this option than become mothers.

The figure is higher than 2007, when it just hit 50 per cent, and consistent with a steady upwards trend since the Government started its controversial Teenage Pregnancy Strategy in 1999.

Figures out on May 21 will also show that for the first time the number of abortions performed on women living in England and Wales topped 200,000.

The teenage pregnancy strategy, which has cost taxpayers more than £300million, was meant to halve the number of conceptions among girls under 18 in England between 1998 and 2010.

Excerpt and image from Daily Mail


Read the whole article and you'll see this has come after an aggressive government campaign to promote contraception use among teens.  Think about it . . .

Instead of an actor on steroids, we pretty much have a whole movie on steroids.  Multiple action sequences, new terminator machines, new characters, and a story that complements the first three movies.   They even figured out a way for (a young special effects version of) Arnold to have a cameo appearance.  If you like killer robots and explosions, this one is for you! 

"Should I get back together with my ex?"

I give some thoughts and advice on this question.

Just go to the podcast page http://kuyakevin.libsyn.com to download.  You can also download it on iTunes--just look for Basta LoveLife in the store.

OK guys, I'm leaving in about an hour for a road trip.  A friend and I are headed to Tuscaloosa in about an hour.  Sunday morning we'll head to my friend's church, where I'll be preaching (I'm looking forward to it--I haven't done any public speaking in weeks).  I'll be back online some time Sunday evening. 

Anyone who listens to our podcast knows Erwin, my teammate/co-host.  He's received some bad news regarding his sister.  Here's a message he sent:

A few hours ago my sister, Emelyn, suffered a massive seizure. As some of you know she has a tumor in her brain. She in now fighting for her life and admitted in the ICU. The doctors told my parents she has 24 hours to live.

Please join me as I get down on my knees to pray for my Ate. Pray that God will give her a miraculous healing and spare her life as she is fighting back to live.

Thank you.

Update:

Erwin posted this within a few hours hours of the prayer request:

My dad called and said Ate is in stable condition na after the seizure but still in ICU. Praise the Lord for His mercies. Please continue to pray for her that she will have complete healing and freedom from this cancer and tumor.

I'm getting serious about publishing an American version of Basta LoveLife. 

I'd like input from Americans who have read it.  What changes do I need to make for Basta LoveLife to be more culturally relevant to Westerners?

I know I'll need to change the statistics (Basta LoveLife's stats are based on the Filipino context) and the title.  But let me know if there are other things I could change.  I have some ideas, but I welcome your input.

More on breakups:

*"Hard vs Easy" breakups.
*Forgiving your ex
*Post breakup etiquette (tackling questions such as: "should I try to be friends with my ex?")


Just go to the podcast page http://kuyakevin.libsyn.com to download.  You can also download it on iTunes--just look for Basta LoveLife in the store.

Here's a classic song by one of my favorites: the late, great Roy Orbison.  I like this duet version (featuring KD Lang).

I have an exciting announcment:  I'll be on the 700 Club Asia in June!

They'll be doing some episodes about love and relationship issues, based on some of the topics in my book. 

Please pray for the 700 Club staff as they prepare the episodes.  I think they'll be adding interviews, skits, etc.  I'm really excited about this--I pray many will be challenged to make godly relationship choices. 


The episodes will air Tuesday nights in June (it will be a series, not just one show).

Mother's Day is coming!  Ladies, God has given you a special gift--the ability to carry a life within your body--use it wisely!  We tackle some of these issues (unwanted pregnancy, abortion, etc) in this episode.

We also answer this question:  "What do I do if I'm not happy in my current relationship?"

Just go to the podcast page http://kuyakevin.libsyn.com to download.  You can also download it on iTunes--just look for Basta LoveLife in the store.

As always, this podcast is 100% free.